while everyone's snoring away at 0113,
im here slogging away with my FIRST DRAFT EOM.
HAH i bet you're gloating away jus cos you handed it in LAST WEEK.
hmmph laugh all you want... i know i deserve it.
erms let me count...
i spent like 2-3 hours on this crap -.-
and yet im only 3quarter done, all thanks to my wonderfully POOR command of the english language.
boooooo i wished i was smarter

oh mans i think i just wasted my weekend sleeping at home =x

i miss seeing all the familiar faces everyday
i miss talking all sorts of nonsense which no one else but them understand
they don t look at you and brood over the ugly side of you
they accept your flaws and bring out the best in you.
silence is golden; you don t need to speak to have a conversation,
deep in our hearts we re having one already,
because its all about understanding from our hearts,
seeing beyond what others can see
and feeling that simple emo connection between us.

24/7 rain or shine. i know you ll be there:DD

(:(: hee i have a sukiSUSHI date next weekend.
lalalala sushi is addictive. highly costly so SAVE before you splurge hahas

theres water trg tommorow(:
heeee kinda excitedd... haven been going down macr since tue =x
20km milage. woahsss. its gonna be real challenging
bring it on baby!

we lost sight of what is of utmost importance.
everyday, we see... but not with our hearts.
the word so highly regarded is reduced to merely fun and more fun.
do we truly understand the fears that gripped their hearts ,
the troubles that daunted their every night and day,
the joy that brought smiles to their weary faces?
then again, "believe"... is it merely lip service?
24/7, are you up to it?

i am guilty as charged.
sorry
i ll change... promise.

hahas corrine &i both have an extremely bad sense of direction
got lost many times during recce =x
but still, recce rockss with all the people you love(:

chiong to jp after that for our dearest ser's birthday surprise.
hahahasss we had fun, LOADS of it.
im really glad for her(:
he's treating her well ... hahass stay happy kay(:(:
and once again, happy seventeen!

blahhhsss im uber broke.
my debts are piling high =x
gahhhss SAD =x

erms fitness test tml. i hope i'll do well(:

*burps
im bloated.
had suki sushi for dinner(: hahas
it was nice and fun and comfy,
with happy company:DDD

yesterday was a nice day.
laughed loads (:
winni has a gu niang voice. HAHAAHA
study session was interesting.
was pretty random and i had an idea of writing out a wishlist(:
so when i achieve my goal or got something i really want,
i'll strike it off... bit by bit, the list will be gone*

i like this week.
i can actually squeeze out some time for my favourite people
lalala. im all smiles(:(:


life is change.
so what if we may drift...
or even forget those days...
be glad that it once happened

oh... my right eye contact flew away during trg at macr.
im burnt with specs on today.
now i got funny tanlines :(

i've so much work to catch up =x grrrrr
its the time. leave no regrets
m o r e.

random survey. erms im jus bored
I miss somebody right now.
I don't watch TV these days.
I wear glasses or contact lenses.
I love to play video games.
I've tried Marijuana.
I have been in a threesome.
I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes.
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year. (yeahsss...)
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I'm TOTALLY smart. (if only)
I've broken someone's bones.
I'm paranoid sometimes. (correction: make that totally)
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I LOVE sushi.
I talk really, really fast.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I can't survive without Caller ID.
I like the way I look.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent. (like what? rawr? -.-)
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I have a lot of friends. (But few are of high-grade quality. But these few are the GREATEST :D)
I am currently single.
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
I enjoy window shopping.
I would rather shop than eat.
I don't hate anyone.
I'm a pretty good dancer.
I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I've rejected someone before.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I've called the cops on a friend before.
I'm not allergic to anything. (Or at least I haven't found anything I'm allergic to.)
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have tried alcohol before.
I have made a move on a friend's significant other or crush in the past.
I own the "South Park" movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
I am happy at this moment.
I'm obsessed with guys.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I've ever met.
I am comfortable with who I am right now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever I can.
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I'm proficient in a musical instrument.
I worked at McDonald's restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules. (i <3 my sport)
I went college out of state.
I like sausages.
I love kisses.
I fall for the worst people.
I adore bright colours.
I can't live without black eyeliner.
I don't know why the hell I just did this stupid thing.
I usually like covers better than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can't whistle.
I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snakes slither.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I've ever written in.
I can't stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions. (but apparently, it always backfires on me)
Climbing trees is a brilliant pastime. (i dont mind, really)
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can't stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
I'm an artist.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy.
I am an adrenaline junkie. (im becoming one though)

my eyes are drooping already.
byebye

B R E A THE

being calm makes loads of differences.
but still,
i lack strength.

more... give more.

six
my favourite no.
the day of my birthday
ten days before the band was formed
ten days before a promise was made
my lane for two semis (nats school and ncc) this year
the boat with the slowest timing.
i don't want it again.

im hooked on vegetarian food(:
it makes me smile in all this madness.


we reap what we sow.
quality doesn't come easy,
i'll have to work for it.
trainings this week further confirmed my fears.
keep pushing,
its never too late

"only with the proper strokes, proper kicking can you attain the proper balence."
i need to get my techniques right...
but while doing so, i'll have to make sure i whack real hard .
otherwise, im in no position to talk about strokes.

i hate politics,
since young... since forever.
im here to lend a listening ear always but i loathe the crap im listening to
how did i land myself into this shit?
im sorry.

deep down, its killing me
sometimes i really wished they divorce so it wouldnt hurt that much

the scar is here to stay.
live with the pain,
live with the memories.
its not your game... it was never once before.
desperation without heart will get you nowhere
dont ask why anymore...
you dont deserve a break, at all.

courtesy of dee

this is our TEAMY


njcanoeing 2006
heart &soul. go the distance.

thank you seniors,
for all that you have done and taught.
the values, the passion, the quality and the loyalty
(:

it isn't just us on this boat,
there's a whole lot of sixty people here.
our team is together with us, right here <3

Brian McKnight- Win
Dark is the night, I can weather the storm.
Never say die, I've been down this road before.
I'll never quit, I'll never lay down.
See, I've promised myself that I'd never let me down, so,

I'll never give up, never give in.
Never let a ray of doubt slip in.
And if I fall, I'll never faint,
I'll just get up and try again.
Never lose hope, never lose faith,
There's much too much at stake,
Upon myself I must depend.
I'm not looking for plays to show, I'm gonna win.

No stopping now, there's still a ways to go.
Ohh, someway, somehow.
Whatever it takes, I know,
I'll never quit, no, no.
I'll never go down.
I'll make sure they remember my name.
A hundred years from now.

I'll never give up, never give in.
Never let a ray of doubt slip in.
And if I fall, I'll never faint,
I'll just get up and try again.
Never lose hope, never lose faith,
There's much too much at stake,
Upon myself I must depend.
I'm not looking for plays to show, I'm gonna win.

When it's all said and done,
My once in a lifetime won back again.
Now is the time, to take a stand.
Here is my chance, that's why,

I'll never give up, never give in.
Never let a ray of doubt slip in.
And if I fall, I'll never faint,
I'll just get up and try again.
Never lose hope, never lose faith,
There's much too much at stake,
Upon myself I must depend.
I'm not looking for plays to show, I'm gonna win.

I'm gonna win.

heart&soul. go the distance.
tomorrow, we will&must row the race of our lives.

to hell with pain,
bring it on.

three more days to nats.
myong said yesterday: if you're afraid and worried, DONT ever go down to race.
ermms i need meditation.

one heart . one soul . one boat
i want to give my best,
for that one chance.
push. endure. fight
for you me us them

i found renewed longing and want today.
yes, this is it.
i can feel the desire building up again(:
thankyou



its funny how some people can be so darn right about certain things.
someone hit a raw nerve yesterday.
although i laughed it off, i couldn't much lie to myself that the someone's words triggered some unwanted memories and affirmed my insecurity.
i tried very hard to not let my fears surface and to convince myself that its ok and i will stand strong ultimately.
but self- denial isnt exactly the most comforting thing to do.
now and then, i'll think about it and then run away from reality again.
its a vicious cycle that im trapped in,
and i don't like it one bit.

i spent two hours reading in the library yesterday evening.
i've been doing many things alone lately.
used to be negative and disgusted at this idea but i seemed to love it nowadays.
perhaps, im finally growing up
or maybe i've gotten too used to it already.

i like to be by myself

THIS IS EXPIRED.
04july06
met up with my fav people today(:
dear bestie and my precious s304
heee the day went like that:
morning trg . WALKING AIMLESSLY AT TOWN WHILE WAITIN FOR BESTIE . taking cine's elevator for like 3-4 times . SHE's HERE!(:(: . galilee&friends . busrides ZZZZ . JEC! 304 :DDD . :'( i had to leave for macr . watertrg . dinner

i think yanzhi has migrated.
she's not answering any of our calls
and her family never seem to be home.
ermmmmsss i miss her, DEARLY.
she's always giving valuable advice and offers almost the perfect solutions to my problems.
and she makes me laugh.
im prayin that its jus one of her another MIA...
i know she'll be fine...
she always is(:

the memories are here to stay.

everytime when you're down and you feel that you carn carry on anymore,
theres always this group of people who never give up on you and are always there to break your fall(:
these people are my pillars of support(:(:
they're the ones who give me the strength to hold on and keep the faith
thankyou


i see them everyday,
and they never fail to lift up my spirits (:
we'll be spending almost our entire two years in njc tgt...
despite all our differences and what sort unhappiness,
i know it'll rock(:
heart and soul <3


today's outing was a blast:D
laughters from the heart.
i smiled(:

the girls did a great job today(:
well done(:
we've to work v v v hard to keep it next year...
all the way.

ermss im sleepy.
bye bye

edit: theres an outing tml.
finally... something to look forward to :D

it hurts so badly
damn. i feel so weak
i hate the way i am recently.
where did all that drive and desire go to?
get a grip, girl... you haven much time left.

different realities.
our paths crossed,
yet i loathed.
sorry






my mind whirls.the scenes of yesterday unreeled in a movie without sound. i struggled, i tried, to unsnarl from this sticky mess, to break my fall amidst this madness. i grappled with the memories. the pain of forgetting all, do you understand?
...
flung across far and beyond, i sank deeper into nothingness. yet i still remember. dont feed me with all your fairytale poison. whoever said time heals all wounds lied. i believed that shit but look at where im heading now...

all i wanted was to tear away from those screaming emotions. the end of nothing . the fullstop to an empty page. where was the chapter? it was never written...

after so long, im still brooding over it. this fucking has to stop. why is it so friggin difficult to even erase one bit of what we shared? i hate you to the core, really
for making me once believe that we'll work out, then taking away everything, almost every part of me. for making me feel like a fool at the end of it
fuck, why was i so stupid.